When Tommy didn’t breathe for two minutes

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  • June 7, 2016
Tommy Pearce

One thing I haven’t talked about since Tommy was born is the excruciating two minutes it took for the young man to take his first breath!

The rollercoaster of emotions went from one second witnessing the bird of a child to then checking to see if the baby is a boy or a girl, to being gobsmacked by the awe and wonder of your child being born, to then waiting like crazy for the young man to CRY!

Oh I’ve never wanted to hear a baby cry so much!

Dark Thoughts

I’d had a couple of dark thoughts (completely stupid, mind you) in the lead up to the birth of Tommy. On the day before Tommy was born I was out going for a run along the beach in Brunswick Heads. One minute I was bopping along to the Black Eyed Peas and then realised it was to the song “Let’s Get Retarded”, which I just had to stop because it just didn’t feel right! The next track that came on was by Hans Zimmer (my favourite composer) and the Soundtrack from Inception (features Leonardo Di Caprio & Matt Damon). The track, as much as I love it, is called “Dream Is Collapsing.”

Now I know, in good old hindsight, that this seems completely ridiculous! But I’m sure you agree that sometimes we humans can be a little irrational and JOIN DOTS that really are in no way connected at all!

So for about 10 seconds after my run I worried that our baby would have some type of brain injury, we would have a stillborn or some type of dream would “collapse”. And then my “captain common sense” brain kicked in and instructed my mind to move on!

However it ALL came coming back the very next day when youngTommy took his time to breathe!

Missing The Magic

Tommy was born at 10:51 last Sunday morning and by about 1pm I was out with Maya and Darby on the skateboard and taking them for a walk to the park.

A part of me was overflowing with joy, the other part was wondering what on earth I was doing at a playground just 150 minutes or so after my newborn son had been born!

Had I missed the magic? Had I moved on SO quickly that I had lost the opportunity to truly revel in the beauty that is a child being born? As the week has progressed, I have gone from “mediocre dad” & “mediocre husband” feelings to “exceptional dad” and “exceptional husband” feelings as the juggling act of life continues to see my serving Sarah and/or one child whilst being away from another.

I know I’m not alone here, which is why I wanted to write this.

Finding The Magic

Whether you have children or not, I think it’s important to recognise that no matter WHAT choice we make in life, there are going to be people who don’t feel supported, people who judge what you do, people who think you SHOULD be doing something else, or doing it differently.

No matter WHAT you are doing right now, I urge you to recognise the MAGIC in this moment RIGHT NOW. That breath you just took is exactly the same as the breath you took when you are born. It’s a sign of LIFE. A sign of OPPORTUNITY. A sign that you are here for a REASON – to support another human being (hello parents) or support a community (hello businesspeople, volunteers and community leaders) or support a planet (hello everyone).

Don’t forget about the magic. Don’t look for something incredibly complex to fulfil you. Find joy in the simplest things – like your child breathing – knowing full well that there are millions of grieving souls out there who could only wish for a deceased love one to be around for one … more … breath.

Exceptionally yours,
Marcus

PS – If the world wasn’t so politically correct I’d post Tommy‘s birth video here right now so you could take a look and feel the magic (and the long wait for the first breath!). But alas, that would cause too much offence in today’s clean and proper world!

PPS – This episode of Inside The Champion’s Mind discusses this “finding the magic” message in more detail.

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